So, in addition to teaching science, I have been commissioned to teach a Piano class this year as a part of a heyletsexpandourartsprogramsoourstatescoresarebetter initiative. Cool. I'm game. It's a ton of fun. I may have arranged Call Me Maybe for 13 keyboards. I may also call it my opus. It's whatever, but you should probably be impressed.
However, every twelve weeks, I start over with a new group of kids. So this trimester as a way of getting to know the kids and getting a grasp on what they know musically and what they don't, I gave them a little questionnaire to fill out. Here is one response.
Do you, or have you ever, played a musical instrument?
Yes. In fifth grade I played cassettes.
If I recall correctly from my experience with the Macarena on tape, it is pretty difficult to get those bad boys to play the song you want, especially if it's in the middle of the tape. You can't rewind or fast forward too far or you will miss part of your song, and if that song is the macarena, it could totally throw off your entire routine, you might be facing the total wrong direction on the hahhhiitttee . She's a real musician.
Wednesday, November 14, 2012
Wednesday, October 3, 2012
The Nerdy Kid Post
So I didn't fully embrace my full nerdom until well into college. I always figured I was a little out there, but I mostly kept it under wraps. Did I love LOVE all the comic book movies that came out when i was in high school? Yes. But the fact that I dreamed about having their powers, I kept to myself. Was I in marching band? Well, Yes. But to this day, I SWEAR it was a cool thing to do at my high school. Did I always have a maybe slightly unhealthy obsession with Jeopardy. Yeah, okay. But again, under wraps.
So I guess for most of my life, I could be referred to as a closeted nerd.
However, now the cat is out of the bag and I live my life in full Jeopardy watching, comic book reading, documentary viewing, Settlers of Catan loving, I almost bought a periodic table shower curtain, science teacher, holynerdwad glory. For the love, at this very moment I am wearing a t-shirt that says I heart science. Except there's a real heart there that's in the shape of an atom. True Story.
Anyway, it is because of this that the real nerdy kids tend to be my posse. Every teacher has a niche of kids that they really like. Some teachers really like athletes and others are good with girls. I however have found my niche among the very nerdy boys. The ones who typically have B.O. and really don't talk about anything but video games and typically wear really funny shirts that have very advanced humor on them (or say Bazinga). That's my crew. I mean, seriously, I'm the academic team coach, it was bound to happen.
So I have this student who is obsessed with riddles. He literally tells me a riddle every day before class starts. I never get them right and always have to give up, but it's a good time. He must seriously spend his life reading riddles, because he can just spew a riddle any time, any where, for any given amount of time.
Yesterday we were driving back from an academic match and it is late. I'm tired, the kids are tired, but they are keeping themselves entertained. The Riddler is coming off a second place Math finish (actually, he was pretty furious about that, he is only okay with first place, he was okay after we talked about how second place is good) at the match AND a free medium fry at McDonalds, so suffice to say his spirits were high. So he's throwing riddles out like his life depends on it. Then I hear this conversation go down.
Riddler: Hey guys, I got one. It's more of a joke, but it's pretty good.
Kids: Okay, sure.
Riddler: What do the Cleveland Browns do when they score a touchdown?
Kids: Ummm... We don't know.
Riddler: They turn off the XBox and go to bed.
I die laughing. This is a funny joke. Good one, Riddler. Then I hear this.
Riddler: And guys! The great thing about that joke?
Kids: What?
Riddler: I hate sports, but everyone else thinks it's funny and you can cater it to the audience based on your region!
I about peed my pants. What 14 year old thinks of these things?
So I guess for most of my life, I could be referred to as a closeted nerd.
However, now the cat is out of the bag and I live my life in full Jeopardy watching, comic book reading, documentary viewing, Settlers of Catan loving, I almost bought a periodic table shower curtain, science teacher, holynerdwad glory. For the love, at this very moment I am wearing a t-shirt that says I heart science. Except there's a real heart there that's in the shape of an atom. True Story.
Anyway, it is because of this that the real nerdy kids tend to be my posse. Every teacher has a niche of kids that they really like. Some teachers really like athletes and others are good with girls. I however have found my niche among the very nerdy boys. The ones who typically have B.O. and really don't talk about anything but video games and typically wear really funny shirts that have very advanced humor on them (or say Bazinga). That's my crew. I mean, seriously, I'm the academic team coach, it was bound to happen.
So I have this student who is obsessed with riddles. He literally tells me a riddle every day before class starts. I never get them right and always have to give up, but it's a good time. He must seriously spend his life reading riddles, because he can just spew a riddle any time, any where, for any given amount of time.
Yesterday we were driving back from an academic match and it is late. I'm tired, the kids are tired, but they are keeping themselves entertained. The Riddler is coming off a second place Math finish (actually, he was pretty furious about that, he is only okay with first place, he was okay after we talked about how second place is good) at the match AND a free medium fry at McDonalds, so suffice to say his spirits were high. So he's throwing riddles out like his life depends on it. Then I hear this conversation go down.
Riddler: Hey guys, I got one. It's more of a joke, but it's pretty good.
Kids: Okay, sure.
Riddler: What do the Cleveland Browns do when they score a touchdown?
Kids: Ummm... We don't know.
Riddler: They turn off the XBox and go to bed.
I die laughing. This is a funny joke. Good one, Riddler. Then I hear this.
Riddler: And guys! The great thing about that joke?
Kids: What?
Riddler: I hate sports, but everyone else thinks it's funny and you can cater it to the audience based on your region!
I about peed my pants. What 14 year old thinks of these things?
Thursday, September 27, 2012
The Bad Geography Post
Maybe I take for granted the fact that all my sister wanted for her sixth birthday was a globe and we played with it non-stop as kids, but seriously, the geography of today's youth is astounding.
Today we were giving presentations and this occurred:
Student: Karl Landsomething...wait, how do you say his name?
Me: Karl Landsteiner.
Student: Yeah. Him. Anyway, Karl was from Virginia, Australia.
Me: Um. Wait a second, I highly doubt that.
Student: Yeah. That's what it says.
Me: Try Vienna, Austria.
Student: What? Where the heck is that?
Me: It's in Europe
Other Student: Wait. I thought Australia was in a different state than Europe.
Me: What? Europe is not a state!
Other Student: What? Yes it is.
Me: Negative, it's a continent. Those are two different places. There is the country of Austria and the continent/country of Australia. Vienna is in Austria. It's close to Germany.
All Students: WHAT?? No. Those are the same.
Oh well. You win some, you lose some.
Monday, September 10, 2012
The Illunderstood Ring Post
I'm finally getting to a point where my students are fun to talk to. I like to know about their lives and hear their funny comments. It's really why I'm a teacher. Oh. And that part about inspiring young minds and molding the future generations. That too.
Background Information: I recently started wearing a ring of my Grandmothers on my right hand. It is silver and small and involves no diamonds.
Background Information: I recently started wearing a ring of my Grandmothers on my right hand. It is silver and small and involves no diamonds.
So today we have a conversation that goes like this:
Student 1: Um. Ms. Kinney. Have you ever had a boyfriend?
Me: I'm 25 years old. Logic would dictate that yes, I have had a boyfriend. (Wrong answer. I forgot about my relationship with my science book...I wasn't thinking on my feet. Teacher fail.)
Student 1: Then why aren't you married?
Me: Well, As you will find out in the future, not all boyfriends are worth marrying.
Student 1: Oh. Well. Everyone's saying you're engaged, so I was just wondering.
Me: WHAT?? Who said that? Why would they think that?
Student 2: Yeah. That was me. I just noticed you got a new ring, so I assumed it was an engagement ring.
Me: No. A flat ring on your right hand is NOT an engagement ring.
I had a similar conversation with two other classes. Apparently I have been one hot topic of conversation among the 13-14 crowd in Bourbon County. I like.
Tuesday, August 14, 2012
The Treasure Chest Post
So. I had a bad teacher moment this morning when I realized that I forgot to get the candy I promised the kids as a reward if they got all their homework problems right. Oops.
My solution. I found my school pictures from last year sitting in my desk drawer. I whipped out a sharpie and signed them like the rock star that I am.
That's right. I gave my students autographed pictures of myself as a reward.
I consider it one of my finer moments as a teacher.
I am starting a treasure chest with more useful items in it, such as band aids, nickels, dead batteries and paper clips.
I think the kids liked it more than candy.
Probably not.
Oh well. They're stuck with me whether they like my antics or not.
At least I think I'm funny.
My solution. I found my school pictures from last year sitting in my desk drawer. I whipped out a sharpie and signed them like the rock star that I am.
That's right. I gave my students autographed pictures of myself as a reward.
I consider it one of my finer moments as a teacher.
I am starting a treasure chest with more useful items in it, such as band aids, nickels, dead batteries and paper clips.
I think the kids liked it more than candy.
Probably not.
Oh well. They're stuck with me whether they like my antics or not.
At least I think I'm funny.
Thursday, August 9, 2012
The Bruce Willis Post
Yeah, I know. It's been forever. Don't hate me too much.
But this is hilarious.
School started today. Nothing particularly noteworthy, except for the girl who found it necessary to tell us that she had a special gift. The gift of seeing dead things. She said if we ever caught her staring into space, to just ask for her attention, because she probably just got distracted by the dead things. She says there is someone else in the school who has this gift as well, but she doesn't know who. Tomorrow I plan to reveal my secret to her.
Here's to a new school year everyone!
Peace, Love and The Sixth Sense,
Claire
But this is hilarious.
School started today. Nothing particularly noteworthy, except for the girl who found it necessary to tell us that she had a special gift. The gift of seeing dead things. She said if we ever caught her staring into space, to just ask for her attention, because she probably just got distracted by the dead things. She says there is someone else in the school who has this gift as well, but she doesn't know who. Tomorrow I plan to reveal my secret to her.
Here's to a new school year everyone!
Peace, Love and The Sixth Sense,
Claire
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
The Boo Yah Post
Now. I'm not normally one to blog about my relationships. Mostly because there are about three people in the world I tell that kind of stuff too, so you can imagine that I'm not big on displaying my personal life for the world to see, although sometimes I wish I did...because it can get pretty hilarious. However, you can know that I have a mildly dramatic dating history, which began when I was about 17 and really hasn't relented since then.
So. When I was 17 and dating my high school boyfriend, high school sweet heart or whatever other stupid name people have for those people you date for your junior and senior year of high school, I gave said boyfriend a birthday gift. Now. Gift buying for a significant other can be very complicated, as I am sure many of you are aware. This is especially true when you are in high school and your communication skills aren't great (heck...mine still aren't great) and you don't know how much to spend, or what to get and you sit and worry three months prior to their birthday that they are going to hate what you bought them. (Oh..that's just me? Well. I guess consider me a basket case of gift giving). Not having any idea what to get him, a friend of mine told me that his backpack had seen better days (AKA it was duct taped together) and suggested that I get him that. I think, sweet, okay, better than the random DVD I had previously thought about. So I give him a new backpack, he says he likes it, we move on, whatever.
Flash forward a year, I'm getting ready to leave for college and have just had an enlightening trip to Europe, and we are in the long and dramatic process of breaking up that shows like Dawson's Creek and One Tree Hill dictate we go through in a manner more ridiculous that necessary. We are having multiple conversations about all the things we hate about each other. Really nice stuff. If you've never heard your boyfriend list all the things he doesn't like about you...you should try it some time...it's delightful. So in this process, he brings up the fact that he did not like the backpack I got him for his birthday. He thought it was lame and unthoughtful or something along those lines...I don't really remember, I've tried to block it out. I am obviously hurt, so I'm sure I retaliated by saying something mean about him and we proceeded on in the essentially year long process that it really takes to truly break these things off (oh wait...that's just me too? Crap.) Today I sat and figured it out. I gave him that backpack in 2005. It is currently 2012. Seven years, my friends.
Today I get a facebook message, from someone I hadn't spoken to in about four years. If you guessed that it was my boyfriend from high school. YOU WIN. The message read:
So. When I was 17 and dating my high school boyfriend, high school sweet heart or whatever other stupid name people have for those people you date for your junior and senior year of high school, I gave said boyfriend a birthday gift. Now. Gift buying for a significant other can be very complicated, as I am sure many of you are aware. This is especially true when you are in high school and your communication skills aren't great (heck...mine still aren't great) and you don't know how much to spend, or what to get and you sit and worry three months prior to their birthday that they are going to hate what you bought them. (Oh..that's just me? Well. I guess consider me a basket case of gift giving). Not having any idea what to get him, a friend of mine told me that his backpack had seen better days (AKA it was duct taped together) and suggested that I get him that. I think, sweet, okay, better than the random DVD I had previously thought about. So I give him a new backpack, he says he likes it, we move on, whatever.
Flash forward a year, I'm getting ready to leave for college and have just had an enlightening trip to Europe, and we are in the long and dramatic process of breaking up that shows like Dawson's Creek and One Tree Hill dictate we go through in a manner more ridiculous that necessary. We are having multiple conversations about all the things we hate about each other. Really nice stuff. If you've never heard your boyfriend list all the things he doesn't like about you...you should try it some time...it's delightful. So in this process, he brings up the fact that he did not like the backpack I got him for his birthday. He thought it was lame and unthoughtful or something along those lines...I don't really remember, I've tried to block it out. I am obviously hurt, so I'm sure I retaliated by saying something mean about him and we proceeded on in the essentially year long process that it really takes to truly break these things off (oh wait...that's just me too? Crap.) Today I sat and figured it out. I gave him that backpack in 2005. It is currently 2012. Seven years, my friends.
Today I get a facebook message, from someone I hadn't spoken to in about four years. If you guessed that it was my boyfriend from high school. YOU WIN. The message read:
Hey. Just wanted to let you know I still use that backpack you got me forever ago. I know I hated on it at the time, but it's worked out well. So ummm. Good job.
Say it with me everyone!
BOO YAH!
Just call me Claire Kinney: Champion Gift Giver.
Thursday, April 19, 2012
To Those Of You Who Think I'm Crazy for Loving 8th Graders.
I have no antics for you today. I'm not feeling much like laughing at my kids, I more feel like hugging them...which is rare, because usually they smell.
Recently, I lost my sweet Grandmother after a long time of being very sick. It was a terrible experience and I will miss her for the rest of my life, but some encouraging things always come of the bad things. One of which was the sweetest note from one of my students today, my first day back after being gone for a few days attending the funeral. This is how it read:
Dear Ms. Kinney,
I know this isn't much, or a real fancy card, but I wanted you to know I care. I remember when I lost my grandmother, it was very hard because I loved her dearly. I know you will get through this with lots of prayer and God. Think of it like this: If she was going through any pain, she isn't anymore. (How she knew this...I will never know) Be strong, and I'm with you. She's watching over you happily and I'm sure she loved you very much. Have a blessed day.
Love Always,
Student
It's amazing how God can use the people I'm supposed to be setting an example for, and the ones that typically give me a headache, to comfort me during my hard times.
Now. I dare you to turn your nose up at me when I tell you I teach 8th grade. My kiddos do have a soul sometimes, and a very sweet one at that.
Now. I dare you to turn your nose up at me when I tell you I teach 8th grade. My kiddos do have a soul sometimes, and a very sweet one at that.
Wednesday, March 28, 2012
The Journal Entry Post
I am seriously obsessed with having my kids write journal entries. It's maybe the best thing ever. The sweet and nurturing teacher in me says it's great because I can find out a lot about them and their hearts. The person who always needs a laugh in me says it's great because it's hilarious. More so the latter.
Journal Prompt:
What are you doing over spring break?
Over spring break, I will have to go shopping. I know it sounds kind of girlish, but I gotta get a tux for the dance. (Yes. 8th grade dance is that big of a deal. tuxes...limos...we know no bounds) I'll play a lot of basketball and I'll watch it too on t.v. Although it's really not interesting anymore since the best team alive, North Carolina, is out. (Dern straight they're out. I used to really like this kid...now I'm rethinking it...) I might play some paintball, but I'll also be texting a lot. You know, when you don't see your girlfriend for a long time, they get mad if you don't text them. (Poor guy...so young and so whipped). But it's okay, I like texting her. (I get really curious as to how involved these texts get sometimes...I mean...it's so arbitrary...We're texting...ABOUT WHAT???) If I still have time, I might get Other Student to come over and ride 4-wheelers.
I think this adequately sums up the life of a middle school boy. Basketball. Texting. Girls. 4-Wheelers.
Quite a life to lead.
Journal Prompt:
What are you doing over spring break?
Over spring break, I will have to go shopping. I know it sounds kind of girlish, but I gotta get a tux for the dance. (Yes. 8th grade dance is that big of a deal. tuxes...limos...we know no bounds) I'll play a lot of basketball and I'll watch it too on t.v. Although it's really not interesting anymore since the best team alive, North Carolina, is out. (Dern straight they're out. I used to really like this kid...now I'm rethinking it...) I might play some paintball, but I'll also be texting a lot. You know, when you don't see your girlfriend for a long time, they get mad if you don't text them. (Poor guy...so young and so whipped). But it's okay, I like texting her. (I get really curious as to how involved these texts get sometimes...I mean...it's so arbitrary...We're texting...ABOUT WHAT???) If I still have time, I might get Other Student to come over and ride 4-wheelers.
I think this adequately sums up the life of a middle school boy. Basketball. Texting. Girls. 4-Wheelers.
Quite a life to lead.
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
The Plague Part II
I've taken a while to post this great story, and I'm not sure why...because it's a good one. If you are a frequent blog reader, you know that back in October I had the plague. You can read about it here.
I don't know how I did it, but somehow I avoided all illness save a tiny sinus infection last year. This year is a different case. Maybe these kids are just more germy or more touchy than last years kids, but I feel like I have been in a constant state of sick since mid October. So after my last experience at the walk in clinic, I swore up and down I would never go back. BUT. Then I got sick on a Sunday and there were rumors of strep throat going around and there really wasn't another option. So back to the land of people who accuse me of being pregnant I went. After all, I thought, what are the odds of me getting the same doctor? Those places have like 20 doctors on staff at random times.
WRONG. After having my vitals taken and waiting in the room for like a small century, in walks none other than everyone's favorite shockingfasttalkerforanenglishlanguagelearner doctor, talking a mile a minute and being demeaning as usual. The visit went fine. He only asked me if I was pregnant once, which is a huge step up from the three times he asked me last time. He figured out my illness pretty quickly, but also determined that I have allergies. Sure. Fine. Whatever. He also determined I needed nasal spray. Okay. Great. Sure. Then this conversation ensued.
Doctor Crazy Pants: HOW YOU USE NASAL SPRAY!?
Me: Um. I don't know. Normally.
DCP: NO! YOU DO STRAIGHT OR TO SIDE?!
Me: I don't know.
DCP: PICK ONE!!!! STRAIGHT UP OR TO SIDE?!
Me: (I'm getting a little panicey here...I haven't been yelled at since I was pulled over for speeding my freshman year of college, and that ended with me in tears) I don't know!! Straight. Straight!
DCP: WRONG!!!!!!!! That okay. You aren't only one. You must spray to side. That where sinuses are.
Then DCP proceeds to put his ink pen up his nose (like not just a little...all the way) and demonstrates which way to point the nasal spray. He even used the clicker on his pen as a pretended sprayer.
I was far too sick and tired to control my reactions. So I laughed in his face. Oops.
Oh well. I guess that's just how the cookie crumbles sometimes. I would say I won't go back there...but at this point...it's just getting pretty entertaining. Maybe I'll even start requesting DCP.
In other news. It is abstinence week, which means I don't teach. Which further means my pinterest has greatly benefited. I'm working on a little write up for you all concerning the awesome questions and comments these little delights are making. I'll warn you ahead of time...these kids aren't as entertaining as last year, but they all still have that ohmygoshthisistheworstthingever look on their faces. They also stare at their hands a lot.
I don't know how I did it, but somehow I avoided all illness save a tiny sinus infection last year. This year is a different case. Maybe these kids are just more germy or more touchy than last years kids, but I feel like I have been in a constant state of sick since mid October. So after my last experience at the walk in clinic, I swore up and down I would never go back. BUT. Then I got sick on a Sunday and there were rumors of strep throat going around and there really wasn't another option. So back to the land of people who accuse me of being pregnant I went. After all, I thought, what are the odds of me getting the same doctor? Those places have like 20 doctors on staff at random times.
WRONG. After having my vitals taken and waiting in the room for like a small century, in walks none other than everyone's favorite shockingfasttalkerforanenglishlanguagelearner doctor, talking a mile a minute and being demeaning as usual. The visit went fine. He only asked me if I was pregnant once, which is a huge step up from the three times he asked me last time. He figured out my illness pretty quickly, but also determined that I have allergies. Sure. Fine. Whatever. He also determined I needed nasal spray. Okay. Great. Sure. Then this conversation ensued.
Doctor Crazy Pants: HOW YOU USE NASAL SPRAY!?
Me: Um. I don't know. Normally.
DCP: NO! YOU DO STRAIGHT OR TO SIDE?!
Me: I don't know.
DCP: PICK ONE!!!! STRAIGHT UP OR TO SIDE?!
Me: (I'm getting a little panicey here...I haven't been yelled at since I was pulled over for speeding my freshman year of college, and that ended with me in tears) I don't know!! Straight. Straight!
DCP: WRONG!!!!!!!! That okay. You aren't only one. You must spray to side. That where sinuses are.
Then DCP proceeds to put his ink pen up his nose (like not just a little...all the way) and demonstrates which way to point the nasal spray. He even used the clicker on his pen as a pretended sprayer.
I was far too sick and tired to control my reactions. So I laughed in his face. Oops.
Oh well. I guess that's just how the cookie crumbles sometimes. I would say I won't go back there...but at this point...it's just getting pretty entertaining. Maybe I'll even start requesting DCP.
In other news. It is abstinence week, which means I don't teach. Which further means my pinterest has greatly benefited. I'm working on a little write up for you all concerning the awesome questions and comments these little delights are making. I'll warn you ahead of time...these kids aren't as entertaining as last year, but they all still have that ohmygoshthisistheworstthingever look on their faces. They also stare at their hands a lot.
Monday, February 13, 2012
The Valentine's Day 2012 Post
With the exception of abstinence training (coming up people...2 weeks), Valentine's day may be my favorite day in the school year. The kids are a flutter with love and teddy bears and flowers and chocolate and generally everything terrible, that looks like valentine's day, that you can buy from the gas station.
Because I needed a laugh, today I gave my kids the following journal prompt:
Valentine's Day. Love? Hate? What was your best Valentine's day ever?
Here are some of the most outstanding responses. Keep in mind, I'm typing them exactly as they are written, so don't judge me for using bad grammar or spelling. Please note the drastic differences between girls and boys.
Girl 1:
Valentine's day is great. I absolutley love it. Every year I always enjoy Valentine's day, but my favorite Valentine's day was in sixth grade. I had a boyfriend on Valentine's day and got a Valentine's gift from him. I got a teddy bear and a note that had a poem on it and a letter to me. I remember stuffing the bear in my bag because I was afraid my dad would see it.
Girl 2:
My best Valentine's day, hopefully, will be this year. One reason why is because someone asked me to be their Valentine. (Side note: WHAT DOES THIS MEAN? do you get no love from the person except on Valentine's Day??) I think Valentine's day is okay. I used to dread it. All it is, is drama. Why is it so hard to say, "Happy Valentine's Day," give someone a card or just say that you like them. It's a day of love. If you don't have anybody, hug your dog cause he or she loves you.
Boy 1:
I really don't care much for Valentine's day because if you are in a relationship, you got to go and buy your girlfriend something. So it's expensive and a waste of money in my opinion. But my best Valentine's day was when I was in elementary school when I could care less if someone got me anything or not. Typically, I would get rid of my women around holidays because it is too expensive. Now I just tell them I'm not getting them anything, so they don't have to get me anything. So it's a win win for both sides.
Boy 2:
I have mixed feelings about Valintine's Day. It's great for couples, but it reminds people who have no one, such as 40 year olds that still live with their mothers, or 30 year olds that still read comics (umm. guilty, except I'm not 30. So, acceptable?), how lonely they are. Valintine's day also burns a whole in your pocket. Money just seems to disapper. Women always want expensive chocolate. Then when you finally save your money up and buy it its gone in a minute. Valintine's day is a day of love or humiliation. Single people such as cat ladies or people who do math for fun become the laughing stock of the day. (this seems a bit dramatic...but we'll go with it). On the bright side is women get all the candy they ever need. Also women are usually in a good mood. This is good for the guys. One day of peace and quit from a woman is like a miracle from Jesus.
This is why journal writing is the best thing that ever happened to my homeroom class.
Well. A Happy Valentine's Day to each of you. May your day be filled with love and at the very least, a sugar high.
Because I needed a laugh, today I gave my kids the following journal prompt:
Valentine's Day. Love? Hate? What was your best Valentine's day ever?
Here are some of the most outstanding responses. Keep in mind, I'm typing them exactly as they are written, so don't judge me for using bad grammar or spelling. Please note the drastic differences between girls and boys.
Girl 1:
Valentine's day is great. I absolutley love it. Every year I always enjoy Valentine's day, but my favorite Valentine's day was in sixth grade. I had a boyfriend on Valentine's day and got a Valentine's gift from him. I got a teddy bear and a note that had a poem on it and a letter to me. I remember stuffing the bear in my bag because I was afraid my dad would see it.
Girl 2:
My best Valentine's day, hopefully, will be this year. One reason why is because someone asked me to be their Valentine. (Side note: WHAT DOES THIS MEAN? do you get no love from the person except on Valentine's Day??) I think Valentine's day is okay. I used to dread it. All it is, is drama. Why is it so hard to say, "Happy Valentine's Day," give someone a card or just say that you like them. It's a day of love. If you don't have anybody, hug your dog cause he or she loves you.
Boy 1:
I really don't care much for Valentine's day because if you are in a relationship, you got to go and buy your girlfriend something. So it's expensive and a waste of money in my opinion. But my best Valentine's day was when I was in elementary school when I could care less if someone got me anything or not. Typically, I would get rid of my women around holidays because it is too expensive. Now I just tell them I'm not getting them anything, so they don't have to get me anything. So it's a win win for both sides.
Boy 2:
I have mixed feelings about Valintine's Day. It's great for couples, but it reminds people who have no one, such as 40 year olds that still live with their mothers, or 30 year olds that still read comics (umm. guilty, except I'm not 30. So, acceptable?), how lonely they are. Valintine's day also burns a whole in your pocket. Money just seems to disapper. Women always want expensive chocolate. Then when you finally save your money up and buy it its gone in a minute. Valintine's day is a day of love or humiliation. Single people such as cat ladies or people who do math for fun become the laughing stock of the day. (this seems a bit dramatic...but we'll go with it). On the bright side is women get all the candy they ever need. Also women are usually in a good mood. This is good for the guys. One day of peace and quit from a woman is like a miracle from Jesus.
This is why journal writing is the best thing that ever happened to my homeroom class.
Well. A Happy Valentine's Day to each of you. May your day be filled with love and at the very least, a sugar high.
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
The Global Warming Post
I'll start with a conversation I had with a student yesterday.
Kid: "Um. Ms. Kinney, I know we're starting to talk about global warming, and I just want you to know that Sam doesn't believe in global warming, and he's really opinionated about it, so you should probably prepare yourself for battle."
Today's Assignment:
Make an accrostic using the letters in GLOBAL WARMING, to tell me what you know about it.
Typical Answer:
G-Greenhouse Effect
L-Land Loss
O-Ozone Layer Depletion
B-Bad for Polar Bears
A- Air quality is affected by carbon emission
L-Louisiana getting smaller
W-Warming of the Earth
A-Atomosphere Harmed
R-Rays of Sun
M-Melting
I-Ice Caps
N-Non-renewable Resources
G- Global Crisis
Sam's Answer:
G-Gas
L-Lies
O-Obsession
B-Bogus
A- Absolutely Ridiculous
L-Leftist
W-Wrong
A-Al Gore is crazy
R-Radical
M-Marxist
I-Idiotic
N-National Socialist Party
G-Green Nut Cases
Well. I think we all know where Sam stands on the 2012 election...
Kid: "Um. Ms. Kinney, I know we're starting to talk about global warming, and I just want you to know that Sam doesn't believe in global warming, and he's really opinionated about it, so you should probably prepare yourself for battle."
Today's Assignment:
Make an accrostic using the letters in GLOBAL WARMING, to tell me what you know about it.
Typical Answer:
G-Greenhouse Effect
L-Land Loss
O-Ozone Layer Depletion
B-Bad for Polar Bears
A- Air quality is affected by carbon emission
L-Louisiana getting smaller
W-Warming of the Earth
A-Atomosphere Harmed
R-Rays of Sun
M-Melting
I-Ice Caps
N-Non-renewable Resources
G- Global Crisis
Sam's Answer:
G-Gas
L-Lies
O-Obsession
B-Bogus
A- Absolutely Ridiculous
L-Leftist
W-Wrong
A-Al Gore is crazy
R-Radical
M-Marxist
I-Idiotic
N-National Socialist Party
G-Green Nut Cases
Well. I think we all know where Sam stands on the 2012 election...
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
The Nuclear Power Plant Post
"Um. Ms. Kinney, I've never really understood the concept of nuclear power plants."
"Okay. What don't you understand?"
"Well. Do they just start with like radioactive seeds??"
"Huh?"
"Ya know, seeds grow into plants."
Bah!
"Okay. What don't you understand?"
"Well. Do they just start with like radioactive seeds??"
"Huh?"
"Ya know, seeds grow into plants."
Bah!
Monday, January 2, 2012
The Lost Cell Phone Post
I am not famous for my ability to keep up with things. I don't necessarily actually lose things to the point of no return very frequently (although my iPod seems to fall in this category recently), but I definitely do a lot of misplacing. If I had a dollar for every time I haven't been able to find my keys when it's time to leave, I could solve world hunger.
This weekend I went to Indianapolis to ring in 2012 with some of my dear friends from college. I'm on my way back yesterday afternoon when my friend calls me to tell me that I left my makeup bag in her bathroom. Annoying. Not something you can easily replace. I turn around. Fortunately at this point I haven't even gotten on the interstate yet. So I go back and get my bag and stop and get some gas on my way out of town. I am about 30 miles down the road when I realize I can't find my phone. I am freaking out already because I'm running behind schedule and I need to get home so I can plan my lessons for the week and clean my apartment for the belated Christmas party I'm having tonight. I decide I am not going back because I have no idea where it is. My thoughts on where it could be: In the parking lot of my friend's apartment, at the gas station or (what I was really convinced had happened) I put it on the roof of my car and drove away, leaving my poor little flip phone crushed to smitherines beneath the wheels of a semi truck. I decide to keep going and figure something out when I get home.
I get all the way to school, after having stopped multiple times to keep looking around in my car, hoping it will turn up and I still can't find it. Knowing that no where was open on a Sunday night, much less a Sunday night that also happens to be New Year's Day. So I buy a pre-paid phone. It's this awesome little Samsung that cost me a grand total of $15, an investment I deem worthy since the phone I'm currently using can't even make a phone call it's so decrepit. I prepare myself to do all my phone business through this little phone that is so basic it doesn't even have t9 texting abilities. I literally had to press every number the number of times I needed for the letter, so like if I wanted to type "R" as in this Really sucks...I had to tap the number 7 three times. Oh well, I can handle it. So I call my parents, explain my predicament and explain to them how I'm the most irresponsible person ever. I make plans with my father to visit the cell phone store today. I get in my car one last time to look and decide to call my phone from my new awesome pre-paid phone, just to see what happens. I figure best case scenerio some weird cashier at the gas station picks up and tells me it's at the Speedway on Kessler in Indianapolis.
Currently my ring tone is Crank Dat Lion King. Which starts with the beginning the Circle of Life, you know, that weird part where someone is screaming African tribal chant at the top of their lungs. This is my best typed interpretation, "AYYYYYYEEEEEEESVEEEEENNNYAAAHHHHHHABBBBbAAABEEECHhEEEEMAAHMAHH... AYELAHASVENYAHMAAAA....HILACOKEAHMA..SVENYAHMAAAAA" The part right before "PINK PAJAMAS PENGUINS ON THE BOTTOM, PINK PAJAMAS PENGUINS ON THE BOTTOM." Which is right before my boy Elton starts belting an awesome melody.
So, what do I hear when I call my phone??
"AYYYYYYEEEEEEESVEEEEENNNYAAAHHHHHHABBBBbAAABEEECHhEEEEMAAHMAHH"
I want to gouge my eyes out.
So I'm frantically searching all around my car looking for this ringing phone and still cannot find it. I think I'm losing my mind at this point. In one last effort to find it, I pick up the boot that I have sitting on my passenger seat. I hold it up to my ear and the tribal chant gets louder. Son of a freaking gun. My phone was in my boot. Why didn't I think to look there?? Duh. My phone obviously has excellent taste in footwear.
The bright side of this story is that I found out I'm good for a phone upgrade...meaning, HELLO 21st Century, it's time for me to have a fancier phone to misplace 24/7. iPhone 4S...I'm coming for you and I've already mentally accessorized you. Hope you're prepared and like cheetah print. Goodbye little flip phone with the moveable camera, I'll miss you and your inability to make a phone call.
That's all for now,
Happy New Year!!
Claire
This weekend I went to Indianapolis to ring in 2012 with some of my dear friends from college. I'm on my way back yesterday afternoon when my friend calls me to tell me that I left my makeup bag in her bathroom. Annoying. Not something you can easily replace. I turn around. Fortunately at this point I haven't even gotten on the interstate yet. So I go back and get my bag and stop and get some gas on my way out of town. I am about 30 miles down the road when I realize I can't find my phone. I am freaking out already because I'm running behind schedule and I need to get home so I can plan my lessons for the week and clean my apartment for the belated Christmas party I'm having tonight. I decide I am not going back because I have no idea where it is. My thoughts on where it could be: In the parking lot of my friend's apartment, at the gas station or (what I was really convinced had happened) I put it on the roof of my car and drove away, leaving my poor little flip phone crushed to smitherines beneath the wheels of a semi truck. I decide to keep going and figure something out when I get home.
I get all the way to school, after having stopped multiple times to keep looking around in my car, hoping it will turn up and I still can't find it. Knowing that no where was open on a Sunday night, much less a Sunday night that also happens to be New Year's Day. So I buy a pre-paid phone. It's this awesome little Samsung that cost me a grand total of $15, an investment I deem worthy since the phone I'm currently using can't even make a phone call it's so decrepit. I prepare myself to do all my phone business through this little phone that is so basic it doesn't even have t9 texting abilities. I literally had to press every number the number of times I needed for the letter, so like if I wanted to type "R" as in this Really sucks...I had to tap the number 7 three times. Oh well, I can handle it. So I call my parents, explain my predicament and explain to them how I'm the most irresponsible person ever. I make plans with my father to visit the cell phone store today. I get in my car one last time to look and decide to call my phone from my new awesome pre-paid phone, just to see what happens. I figure best case scenerio some weird cashier at the gas station picks up and tells me it's at the Speedway on Kessler in Indianapolis.
Currently my ring tone is Crank Dat Lion King. Which starts with the beginning the Circle of Life, you know, that weird part where someone is screaming African tribal chant at the top of their lungs. This is my best typed interpretation, "AYYYYYYEEEEEEESVEEEEENNNYAAAHHHHHHABBBBbAAABEEECHhEEEEMAAHMAHH... AYELAHASVENYAHMAAAA....HILACOKEAHMA..SVENYAHMAAAAA" The part right before "PINK PAJAMAS PENGUINS ON THE BOTTOM, PINK PAJAMAS PENGUINS ON THE BOTTOM." Which is right before my boy Elton starts belting an awesome melody.
So, what do I hear when I call my phone??
"AYYYYYYEEEEEEESVEEEEENNNYAAAHHHHHHABBBBbAAABEEECHhEEEEMAAHMAHH"
I want to gouge my eyes out.
So I'm frantically searching all around my car looking for this ringing phone and still cannot find it. I think I'm losing my mind at this point. In one last effort to find it, I pick up the boot that I have sitting on my passenger seat. I hold it up to my ear and the tribal chant gets louder. Son of a freaking gun. My phone was in my boot. Why didn't I think to look there?? Duh. My phone obviously has excellent taste in footwear.
The bright side of this story is that I found out I'm good for a phone upgrade...meaning, HELLO 21st Century, it's time for me to have a fancier phone to misplace 24/7. iPhone 4S...I'm coming for you and I've already mentally accessorized you. Hope you're prepared and like cheetah print. Goodbye little flip phone with the moveable camera, I'll miss you and your inability to make a phone call.
That's all for now,
Happy New Year!!
Claire
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