Note that I have used the ever popular colon in this title...indicating that I am both very serious about this topic and there are more (hopefully many) to come.
As many of you may know, Halloween is my least favorite holiday...ever. I hate it even more than the Valentine's day I spent sitting alone in my dorm room eating Chinese food while the rest of my best friends were on dates with their boyfriends...or the Christmas banquet I went to as a seventh wheel. (Do the math...three couples plus me) Anyway, my point is...I hate Halloween.
This is how I view it: As a kid Halloween is awesome. You wear super great costumes (if you are me you got to be a Claire-ibu (like a Caribou, get it...?) and Albert Einstein...CHA-CHING!) AND you get tons of candy. Win win situation. Then, sometime in high school, the tables start to turn, you're too old to go trick-or-treating and too young to really party it up, so you end up spending the evening handing out candy with your parents...awesome. (or, if you're me...you spend the evening on a band trip...which always seemed to happen) Then college comes around and it's suddenly popular to dress as a slutty something (slutty lumber jack and slutty darth vader are some of my favorites that I've seeen) and get schmammered. Not really my scene. Combo this mess with my intense hatred for all things scary and you can pretty much chalk up the last two weeks of October as a loss for me.
So, my dear friend Justin has a differing view...in that he's basically obsessed with Halloween and spends more time than I care to know thinking about fake body parts and his dream of owning a haunted house conglomeration. SO naturally, when Justin heard about the opportunity to be an actor in a Haunted House, he jumped at the opportunity. AND when he heard about the intense shortage of people, he started recruiting and talking about it NON-STOP. So. After Justin texted me the number to call every day and promised me a pack of popsicles if I did it, I gave the guy a call and found my self at a meeting this evening for people interested in acting Fright Night at Jacobson Park. I. Don't. Know. How. This. Happened.
Well. Let me tell you, if you are interested in some good people watching...go to a meeting for people interested in acting in a haunted house. One of the guys running this deal was wearing creepy contacts and when his phone went off it legitimately played the Halloween theme song. I mean really...can you be any more stereotypical? Also. If I had a dollar for every facial piercing in the place...I wouldn't have to teach anymore...I can tell you that much. Also. There was an intense amount of black. I looked a little out of place...but what else is new?
So, part of this meeting was going through the haunted house with the lights on...this was legitimately interesting. The owner also talked to us in every room and told us all the inner workings. Also. Let me describe the owner for you: Blonde Dread locks, eyebrow ring, lip ring, beard, HUGE muscles and I'm ashamed to admit...oddly attractive. He also had all kinds of sweet lingo..for instance...Haunted House...shorten that to The Haunt...sounds much cooler right? Further also, there is no air conditioning in this place, so everyone's eyeliner and guyliner is starting to run and you can see the sweat beading up around this facial piercings...no bueno.
After the tour, we went outside again, discussed some logistics and signed up, which involved waiting in line and getting your picture taken. So. I guess I'm signed up to scare the crap out of some people come October. Apparently I also get to be trained in the art...this should be interesting...
Peace, Love and Creepers,
Claire
Thursday, July 28, 2011
Friday, July 22, 2011
BK: Have It Your Way
This post goes out to my new BFFL Ramiero.
Who's Ramiero?
My Burger King Lover.
Unfortunately, VERY unfortunately for both my budget and my calorie count (which I don't count..but whatevs), there is a Burger King on my way to work for the summer. You may be thinking that Burger King is gross, and you would be correct if you are thinking about Whoppers and Whopper Jrs with Cheese. Those are gross. However, their Cini-Minis are about the best thing I ever put in my mouth and they have Coke products, helping me to spur on my ever increasing addiction to Diet Coke. Also, none of this requires me to actually cook in the morning, or even make sure that I have groceries in my refrigerator.
So. Every morning for like 4 weeks now I have been stopping at BK to help out my bleak breakfast situation. Enter Ramiero.
For the first 3.5 weeks, Ramiero never really said anything, he just handed me my Cini-Minis and Diet Coke and we were on our way. He back to his fryer...me on to my darling children awaiting me in the nine zillion degree weather.
It all changed a week and a half ago when I brought my own diet coke from home. Woah did that one throw him for a loop. "No Diet Coke for you Baby?" he asked me.
The next day, not wanting to stress Ramiero out any more than necessary and having an intense love for diet coke in a cup with ice, I got my usual. At this point Ramiero starts being extra nice to me and calling me sweetheart. Cha-Ching.
The next day I pull up to the drive through and Ramiero comes on the speaker and says, "Cini-Minis and a Medium Diet Coke?" Oh yes.
The next day:
Ramiero: "Welcome to Burger King. Would you like to try Cini-Minis and a Medium Diet Coke?"
Ohhh snap...Ramiero pulled a funny!
The next day:
Rameiro: "Oh no baby!! We are out of Cini-Minis!!!"
Me: "It's fine! No stress." (Secretly I was a little stressed...I'm developing a healthy addiction, but I wasn't going to make Ramiero feel worse than he already did)
Rameiro: "Sweetheart I was so stressed this morning, they only gave me TWO Cini-Minis for the morning and some lady came and ordered both of them and I though OH NO! So here's your Diet Coke, it's on me."
Today:
Ramiero: "Baby, I am making you some fresh Cini-Minis and it is all on me today."
Oooohh Yeah. This kid now has Burger King Connections.
I add Ramiero to the gas station attendant at Thorntons and the owner of Roly Poly, who recognized me even after I had been away at college for three years. I guess you just don't forget a mug like mine...or I'm just such an extreme creature of habit that I just pound my face into people's mind by shear force.
Peace, Love and New Friends,
Claire
Some Things to Consider:
1. Yesterday a kid in my group at camp farted. Me and my entire pack literally laughed for 20 minutes about this. It was then that I realized that my true calling really is teaching middle school. I'm sorry, I don't care who you are...farting in stinking hilarious...every time. Especially when it is coming out of the cutest little Asian child you have ever seen.
2. I'm going to start going back to school this week...I am BEYOND excited!!
Who's Ramiero?
My Burger King Lover.
Unfortunately, VERY unfortunately for both my budget and my calorie count (which I don't count..but whatevs), there is a Burger King on my way to work for the summer. You may be thinking that Burger King is gross, and you would be correct if you are thinking about Whoppers and Whopper Jrs with Cheese. Those are gross. However, their Cini-Minis are about the best thing I ever put in my mouth and they have Coke products, helping me to spur on my ever increasing addiction to Diet Coke. Also, none of this requires me to actually cook in the morning, or even make sure that I have groceries in my refrigerator.
So. Every morning for like 4 weeks now I have been stopping at BK to help out my bleak breakfast situation. Enter Ramiero.
For the first 3.5 weeks, Ramiero never really said anything, he just handed me my Cini-Minis and Diet Coke and we were on our way. He back to his fryer...me on to my darling children awaiting me in the nine zillion degree weather.
It all changed a week and a half ago when I brought my own diet coke from home. Woah did that one throw him for a loop. "No Diet Coke for you Baby?" he asked me.
The next day, not wanting to stress Ramiero out any more than necessary and having an intense love for diet coke in a cup with ice, I got my usual. At this point Ramiero starts being extra nice to me and calling me sweetheart. Cha-Ching.
The next day I pull up to the drive through and Ramiero comes on the speaker and says, "Cini-Minis and a Medium Diet Coke?" Oh yes.
The next day:
Ramiero: "Welcome to Burger King. Would you like to try Cini-Minis and a Medium Diet Coke?"
Ohhh snap...Ramiero pulled a funny!
The next day:
Rameiro: "Oh no baby!! We are out of Cini-Minis!!!"
Me: "It's fine! No stress." (Secretly I was a little stressed...I'm developing a healthy addiction, but I wasn't going to make Ramiero feel worse than he already did)
Rameiro: "Sweetheart I was so stressed this morning, they only gave me TWO Cini-Minis for the morning and some lady came and ordered both of them and I though OH NO! So here's your Diet Coke, it's on me."
Today:
Ramiero: "Baby, I am making you some fresh Cini-Minis and it is all on me today."
Oooohh Yeah. This kid now has Burger King Connections.
I add Ramiero to the gas station attendant at Thorntons and the owner of Roly Poly, who recognized me even after I had been away at college for three years. I guess you just don't forget a mug like mine...or I'm just such an extreme creature of habit that I just pound my face into people's mind by shear force.
Peace, Love and New Friends,
Claire
Some Things to Consider:
1. Yesterday a kid in my group at camp farted. Me and my entire pack literally laughed for 20 minutes about this. It was then that I realized that my true calling really is teaching middle school. I'm sorry, I don't care who you are...farting in stinking hilarious...every time. Especially when it is coming out of the cutest little Asian child you have ever seen.
2. I'm going to start going back to school this week...I am BEYOND excited!!
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