On Weddings and Dancing...

Well friends, now that I don't have any awesome stories to tell you about my students, I've decided to regale you with some ridiculous stories of my past.  I know it's hard to believe, but I pretty much came out of the womb ridiculous.

Yesterday I attended the wedding of some friends that I used to work with at IncrediPet and yes, they did meet at IncrediPet because nothing is more romantic than uniform red polo shirts, sweating it up hauling dog food and cleaning up dog poo.  Anyway, it was a wonderful wedding and a lot of fun, but it did bring back some very painful memories for yours truly and NO it was not the memory of the fact that I am almost 24 and no where close to having my own wedding...but thanks for bringing it up.

Why the world insists on partaking in dancing at weddings is beyond me.  Seriously, before I went to college, I had no idea people danced at weddings, I thought you just ate food and talked....but, I also didn't know that weddings had color schemes until I was a senior in high school in a conversation that went something like this:

 Girl: "I'm going to a wedding tonight where the colors are brown and creme...we'll see how that looks..."
Me: "Um..the colors?"
Girl: "Yes. The colors."
Me: "What do you mean the colors?"
Girl: "Like the colors they are using in their wedding..."
Me: "Oh."

The conversation ended there, but I was still clueless, I had to go home and ask my mom what the heck she was talking about.  She explained, but I think it was a proud moment for her because it proved she definitely hadn't raised me to be a wedding focused girl.

Sorry about the tangent...anyway, I had no idea people danced at weddings...because they certainly don't in my family.  I remember my father saying something along these lines about a distant cousins wedding:

"Oh my gosh...she's just trying to be ridiculous and rebellious, having dancing at her wedding...sheesh."

True story.  Anyway, I definitely wasn't raised a dancer...in fact, I avoided prom for this very reason.  There is just nothing appealing to me about standing in middle of the floor rubbing up against other people in tune to some inevitably bad music.  Although granted at weddings it's almost (I say almost for a reason) never as trashy as that.  However every wedding comes with the same excellent set of songs.  Cupid Shuffle, Cha Cha Slide and my personal favorite the electric slide.  Luckily for myself I have become a lot more coordinated over the years, but the electric slide has been a point of dissension in my past thanks to my eighth grade P.E. teacher Mrs. Smith.  We once had an interaction that went something like this:

The entire class is electric sliding, myself included...or so I thought.

Mrs. Smith: "Claire! What are you doing??"
Me: "Um..the electric slide."
Mrs. Smith: "NO! That is not how you electric slide!" She then proceeded to show me how to do the electric slide. "Now you do it!"
I try.
Mrs. Smith: "CLAIRE YOU AREN'T EVEN TRYING!!!!!" I totally was...I was just that bad.

I think if it had been a few years earlier, I probably would have just sat down on the floor and started crying.  I mean, my gosh woman...I know I'm not coordinated, that why my dad wouldn't let me play t-ball and why my mom never signed me up for dance class.  I lacked hand to foot continuity...as in it took me FOREVER to learned to ride my tricycle because I would either steer or pedal, not both at the same time. I was destined to be a dork from the time I was three...it was a fact of life and I had accepted it...but my gosh woman...there's really no need to rub it in in front of the class.  I had other skills and abilities in the way of whistling and reading Baby Sitter Club books...sheesh, you'd think I was without talent the way she talked.

Anyway, I went home and practiced the stupid electric slide for like 4 hours until I had it perfect, I went back the next day and beasted it....but I still got a B in gym that quarter for lack of effort.  What the crap Mrs. Smith? What the crap.

Peace, Love and the teacher I never want to be,
Claire

Some Pictures to Supplement:

Clearly very excited about the dance circle in standard Claire dance pose (clapping hands) at Laura and Grant's wedding...

Mocking my friend Sarah's dance moves...probably because I can't actually do it myself (and also because that is probably the most ridiculous dance I've ever seen) at Maggie and Ben's wedding...

Ah yeah. I forgot to mention The love train...made infinitely more awesome by 3D glasses.