Of Hot Pants and Convicts

Two stories for you this evening:

1. One time Melissa Coffey came to my apartment. She got bored and needed coffee while I was at work. She decides to turn left in search of a coffee shop or gas station. Mistake. Long story short...she's basically stalked by a wacky guy in a car with tinted windows and has basically thought I live in the hood ever since. Disclaimer before I tell you the actual story. I do not live in the ghetto...although my apartment may be near a few ghettos and is basically just a really busy area, so there are a lot of people. All that to say...I'm afraid she may have been right. I am always able to hear what people are listening to on their car radios or if they're walking...I can definitely tell what they are talking about. This is what I hear today, "Yeah man. I just got out of jail last night!" Greeatttt..

2. Last night I had the weirdest dream of my life. I dreamt that I was at school. Doing my normal science awesome thing. When all of the sudden a new student appeared at my door. He was very tall and happened to be wearing only see through tights with lace underwear underneath and a ratty black t-shirt that came to his belly button. (Yes. You read HE correctly). Naturally, being my dress code enforcing self...I told the student that he would probably need to go home and return with something more decent on. The student replied that he would rather not and proceeded to grab me by the back of the neck and strangle me as he dragged me down the hallway. I survived and people watched it happened, but then he let me go and everyone was just like, "oh..go to class, no biggie." No one cared that some kid had just made his WWE wrestling moves a reality on me. I don't know what to make of this. Let's hope dreams don't become a reality. Also. The student wasn't just a made up character...he was this creepy kid that was in my German class my freshman year of high school who always wore hot pink plastic pants to school and occasionally a shirt that hit at his belly button. I never spoke to him... but he's obviously left a lasting impression.

Claire

Some Things to Consider:

I'm lacking today...the last time I lacked was when I dreamed that I was late for the first day of school. I seriously need to hold off on these bizarro dreams...they're effecting my steeze (which according to urban dictionary can be spelled either steeze or steaze...i chose steeze...but you'll have to decide which version you like better...i like this choose your own spelling game...)